Because when it comes to affairs of the heart, everyone plays, but does anyone win? You've recently gotten out of -- climbed, struggled, dealt with -- a serious relationship, and you're craving some sort of intimacy and comfort.
You could go back to your ex, but you broke up for a reason. Maybe you should find a rebound, maybe even another ex, but would that make things better or worse?
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Relationship experts' advice is mixed about rebound relationships. Some dismiss their seriousness or potential viability, while others suggest that they are a required step towards a more legitimate relationship, and a great distraction and strategy for dealing with getting over an ex.
The journal article, "Too fast, too soon?
An empirical investigation into rebound relationships," published in in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, is one of the few recent research studies on rebound relationships. A breakup causes an emotional and physical gap and a rebound can be the solution.
Not only can a partner supply the physical needs that were lost through their physical presence and by fulfilling sexual needs, but if a new partner is in some way similar to an ex, feelings of attachment can naturally transfer towards a new partner without a large dating meaning health use of time.
In this instance, you may be tempted to lower your standards just because you need a distraction, but be warned, this will probably make you more attached to your ex, and feel even worse than before.
Think about it: You can't stop thinking about your ex, so you distract yourself with someone for a night, and then afterward not only are you still thinking about your ex, but now you're thinking about how much better your ex is than anyone else. There needs to be something about a rebound that is better than your last relationship.
Is this person more physically attractive, funnier, or do you get to do really fun things you never had the chance to do with your ex? You want to interrupt the connection from your ex, and the best way to do so, especially while you are still dealing with the breakup, is by seeking out positive and unique experiences with someone new.
A rebound is supposed to help you move on from an ex, and should distract your thoughts and body. The more time you spend with someone, the more you hardwire responses toward each other -- and if you're currently out of a relationship, you are hardwired to your ex.
A rebound that is in some way better than your dating meaning health use relationship may disrupt that connection. It literally can alter the neural pathways in your brain, and re-teaches it to feel good without having your ex around -- which means you have to feel good around your rebound.
A rebound has positive benefits because it boosts your confidence and replaces the void from the previous relationship. You don't have to physically rebound with someone else to gain the benefits.
If you really need comfort, you can also distract yourself dating meaning health use other forms of non-physical rebounding connection, such as through social media, texting, etc. Next time you're just recently out of a serious relationship, and you're craving some sort of intimacy and comfort, feel confident that a rebound might actually be a good thing — as long as it's an upgrade, either physically, emotionally, a fun date, or even just finding a way to shift your mentality toward viewing your situation now as better than your situation before.